23 + 23 = 46

December 21, 2012 = 12, 21, 2012.

Warning. This is terrifying.

If you multiply the two singular numbers in '12' you get 2 (1 * 2 = 2) and then add the two singular numbers in '21' you get 3 (2 + 1 = 3), the results of these two equations are 2 & 3 or simply 23. As we all know from the movie The Number 23, the number 23 is the most evil number known to man.

To take it a step further, if you add the first two singular numbers in '2012' you get 2 (2 + 0 = 2) and if you add the last two singular numbers you get 3 (1 + 2 = 3), the results of these two equations are 2 & 3 or simply 23. Yeah, you fucking read that right! It's the fucking most evil number ever, again.

With the culmination of two seperate 23's, this date is double-fucking-evil.

But wait, it gets even more evil. Add the two 23's together and you get 46 (23 + 23 = 46). Then, divide 4 by 6 and you get...666 (4/6 = .666)!!! Holy fucking evil bad devil shit!

I'm not fucking done yet, nuh uh. Instead of adding those 23's together, just divide each's singular numbers (2/3 and 2/3), guess what you fucking get again...666! Two of those motherfuckers, double evil bad devil shit!

We're still not fucking done, guys. Add those 666's together and you get 1332 (666 + 666 = 1332). Why is 1332 significant? I'll tell you why...If you add the first two singular numbers together and multiply the last two singular numbers together you get 4 & 6 (1 + 3 = 4; 3 * 2 = 6). Divide these final two singular numbers together and...

YOU GET THE ULTIMATELY EVIL GINORMOUS NAZI ZOMBIE WEREWOLF DEVIL DEMON STEP-MOTHER JEWISH 666! THE MOST EVIL OF ALL 666'S.


I have to admit, I began this blog with the intention of mercilessly belittling this recently popular theory. I had a whole tangent lined up about how it fit somewhere between the '9/11 Inside Job' and 'God' theories, how the theory makes no sense because it's actually the 13th time the Mayan Calendar has rolled over, how some people actually interpret the day as a positive shift in our planet, how all apocolyptic theories are pure psychobabble bullshit, and about how the Mayans couldn't even live in real houses or drive cars much-less predict the end of the world.

But I'm afraid I've unexpectedly persuaded myself to become a believer. The numbers just don't fucking lie, there's just so much evidence there. How could it not be true?

We're all fucked.


P.S. Don't forget to wish me an early Golden Birthday on December 20th, 2012. I'm afraid my party might be cancelled.