No Tears for the Fallen

Death is not a clean slate, death does not make you innocent. Every death is not a tragedy.

With celebrity death on the rise, I've noticed my sympathy failing to keep up with that of everyone else's. I can't bring myself to forgive and forget that easily. Death is not a fucking magic eraser.

Heath Ledger. Farah Fawcett. Michael Jackson. Billy Mays. Steve McNair.

The only one who hits the proverbial 'tragedy button' for me is Billy Mays. He was a man in his apex, he was a man of the people who helped everyone he could, and he was all around a good and caring guy. Many people loved Billy Mays, but most didn't even know why.

I'm also willing to compromise that McNair and Fawcett's deaths were a touch upsetting and untimely, although it's not as though either were role models or great losses. Fawcett was a known drug addict who wasn't afraid to flaunt it in public mediums, and McNair was a cradle-robbing adulterer. Even before and after their deaths, people had lost interest in them. Fawcett was barely news breaking as she was overshadowed by Michael, and McNair wasn't even a featured story anywhere outside of ESPN. I don't understand why we're hung up for more than a moment over the losses of these two. They're just people, no more valuable than you or me, when multitudes of other people died these same days, and we could care less. I can't make sense of it.

But then there's the two who are prime examples for the point I'm trying to make. Michael Jackson and Heath Ledger. Both elite talents in their fields, both award winning entertainers, both extremely skilled. But none of that is justification for overlooking that they killed themselves. Maybe intentionally, maybe on accident, it doesn't matter, they both decided to consume lethal volumes of drugs, and unsurprisingly got to the point of OD. I can't be convinced that Heath didn't know better than to mix 8 prescription pills, all pills he clearly sought after and coveted. I can't be convinced Michael hadn't been a long-time user who knew his habits would inevitably catch up to him. Both killed themselves, while alive, and to end their life. They didn't seem to care that they were leaving their children behind, Michael didn't care about his $400 Million debt situation, Ledger didn't care about his commitment to The Imagination of Dr. Parnassus. So why should we all be so fucking upset? Because we're starstruck? It's not as if anyone had cared about or liked Jackson in his final years, he had fallen from grace financially, he was accused of child molestation, his songs weren't on the radio and his videos were never shown on TV, his severe plastic surgery was the butt of relentless jokes, and he was unabashedly scrutinized about his fatherhood. But he dies, and our facade quickly changes to one of mourning? His songs and videos are played world-wide? Millions try to get tickets to his funeral at the Staples Center? Everyone bawls their fucking eyes out and calls it tragedy? Ledger starts being called the greatest film actor of his day? He wins an Oscar that some believe he didn't deserve? The sales of his films sky-rocket? Everyone bawls their fucking eyes out and calls it tragedy?

It doesn't add up for me. I have a short amount of sympathy for those who don't deserve it and for those who are the bearers of their own demise. If you want to be upset about something, be upset about the war casualties because some towel-head sets off an IED, be upset about the still-born babies who don't even get a chance to fuck their lives up, be upset about civil servants who lose their lives simply trying to do their mediocre blue-collar jobs. Don't get caught up on people based on their celebrity, who only live to let you down, and then kills themselves when they can't cope with the shit they've gotten themselves into. They're just people. People Die.

- The Christian Pankow.


P.S. RIP Michael! You're an icon and we'll never forget you! <3